


Contact Me, If You Want

by lesbianisakeijser



Category: Druck | SKAM (Germany)
Genre: Canon Trans Character, M/M, Originally Posted on Tumblr, there are things her which refer to outing so be gentle on yourselves!!!!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-08
Updated: 2019-05-08
Packaged: 2020-02-28 11:43:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,496
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18755791
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lesbianisakeijser/pseuds/lesbianisakeijser
Summary: david was in his room all day long, not wanting to talk to anyone, when laura knocks on his door. written after the end of 3x8.





	Contact Me, If You Want

there is a knock on his door. “david?”

laura, he realizes. he doesn’t reply. he knows she won’t come in if he doesn’t let her, and he really doesn’t want to be anywhere next to another person right now. he had turned off his phone after seeing matteo’s texts, and was reading with music in the background ever since. he used to go and hide, but he didn’t have it in him to do that to laura, so he tried a different way to deal with his nagging brain. so far he had finished two books, and he was halfway through the third.

_“are you in love with him?”_  
“no!”  
“you wouldn’t be the first person to fall for a jerk, henry.” 

it was one of his favorite lines from this book. but unfortunately, he wasn’t really in the mood to stop everything and think about it. he didn’t want to think about falling in love, because that meant thinking about matteo, and that wasn’t any good lately.

“david?” laura tried again, “i wouldn’t come in, but take off your binder. it’s been a lot more than eight hours and you have terrible binding habits anyway. i don’t want you falling asleep with it again.”

david took a deep breath and put his book aside. avoiding his reflection, he took off his shirt and then his binder, quickly, and made a big effort to put his shirt on as fast as he could. he met his reflection’s gaze for a second before looking away. the mirror in his room was there for good days, not bad ones. and this day is definitely a bad one.

“i took it off,” he told laura from the other side of the door, though he knew she wouldn’t be satisfied.

she opened the door just a little and pushed her hand inside his room. she did that, sometimes, asking him to keep the binder and put it next to his bed in the morning before she goes to work. it didn’t happen often, but it happened when she didn’t really trust david’s common sense. not surprisingly, this was one of them, too.

david put the binder in her hand, and she closed the door, leaving him alone, again. if she were anyone else, he would feel bad for not communicating. but it’s laura. she knows him better than anyone, and she knows exactly when it’s not her and when david really needs to be alone and when she should never let him be by himself. quite often he thought of how much she had done for him - for both of them - and when these thoughts cross his mind, he usually asks her about her day or says he’ll make dinner or wash the dishes, even though it’s her turn.

he looked at his book, but he didn’t want to continue with it suddenly. he had already finished _ari and dante_ and _the picture of dorian gray _, and even though he loves the one he’s reading, he really feels like reading a few short stories instead. something that ends quickly, problems that solve themselves in many different ways.__

____

____

_and if they don’t believe me now, will they ever believe me?_

despite himself, david smiled at the song. it was always one he particularly liked from the album. this song is one of the reasons he had bought this as a record. when he packed his bags from his parent’s house, he didn’t have much time and space, but felt like he needs to take this record with him. it made sense to him then, and it makes sense to him now. laura had saved money for almost a year to buy him a record player for his birthday, and since then, every time he felt down and didn’t want to have his phone on he’s listen to _the queen is dead_.

he picked _the happy prince and other stories_ from his small library and sat down on his bed again. he really did feel like shit, but for some reason, reading about characters who die and suffer and sacrifice themselves makes him feel better, like there are some who have it worse. he said that to laura once, and she told him she keeps in her library the exact opposite of books - the happy ones, with the sweetest and most joyful plots, because that distracts her when she’s down.

after some time he heard muffled talking from the other side of the door, and tried to understand who laura was talking to, because he didn’t hear anyone else. even though he didn’t want to talk to anyone, he thought that maybe talking to laura would help. so he put his book aside, got up and opened the door.

she had just hung up a phone conversation. “hey”, she said, her voice the softest he had ever heard.

david tried to force a smile, but he realized it must look sadder. “hey. who did you talk to - oh. wait. you have a date tonight, don’t you?”

laura smiled. “i was just talking to her, actually. i told her i can’t come today, but we decided to meet some other time.” she sat on the couch.

david did, too. “why? you can go.”

laura shook her head. “no. my brother’s not going to make himself dinner and will probably bind for twenty-four hours if i wouldn’t tell him to stop, and anyway, i want to be with him if he’s feeling down. because i’ve actually never seen him like that.”

david tried to blink back tears. he could just tell her. he could let himself break down and let her hug him and tell him they don’t have to stay anywhere and that matteo doesn’t deserve him. he could do that. he knows she would be as good as she can about it. and yet, there’s something stopping him.

“you can talk to me, you know. you don’t have to, but you can.” her eyes are sincere. “i want you to know that. i don’t want to stress you to do anything, but i -”

“i was outed again,” he said, and that’s it, he really did say it, and he couldn’t stop his tears now. “everyone was laughing, and i was supposed to meet up with matteo and talk but i just ran away like i always do and he tried to call me but i can’t talk to anyone now.” he sniffed, his cheeks wet, and laura pulled him towards her and hugged him tight. “i don’t know what to do, laura.”

she took a deep breath. “me neither. but i think that’s okay that we don’t know what to do. i don’t think anyone knows what to do. but we won’t know what to do together, okay? i’m glad you told me. and it’s okay that you didn’t talk to matteo. he should understand, and if he doesn’t, he would’ and if he wouldn’t - you’re probably better off without him and his baggy pants.” david muffled a laugh against her shoulder. “i mean it, though. i don’t care about some stupid white cis boy who keeps doing stuff at the wrong times. i care about you. and if thinking about him stresses you out, it shouldn’t be it. i know you like him. but still.”

“i don’t know how i can talk to anyone from school now,” he whispered, “i’m - laura, that’s why i ran away. i can’t do that again.”

laura broke the hug to hold his face between her hands and lay their foreheads together. “listen to me. wherever you want to be, we can do that. wherever you want to go, we can go there. you’re not a burden, david. if you don’t feel safe here, we can go to somewhere else and try again. and if you don’t feel safe there, either, we’ll try again until we’re somewhere you want to be.” her eyes were looking right on his, daring and caring at the same time. “okay?”

he nodded. “but what do i do now? i - someone’s going to find us and report us and you know what happened the last time authorities discovered we live her. it’s not like it’s that easy. and we have enough stuff marked on our door, we don’t need any more things.”

“i didn’t say it would be easy. but i won’t let you suffer, david. i can’t. i won’t let this happen. are you listening to me? if you feel like you can’t be here, we won’t be here.” she had a hand strong on his shoulder, and generally speaking he didn’t like people touching him, but laura was not just people. she was laura. and david really does love her with his entire heart.

“okay.”

“do you want to watch a movie?” she asked, a barely visible smile in her eyes, “only lovers left alive?”

david shook his head. “inception,” he said instead, and they turned their computer on.

**Author's Note:**

> the book quote is from “we are the ants” by shaun david hutchinson, p. 226. the book is about a boy named henry who knows when the world will end, and to prevent it he just needs to press a button. the book follows the debates within himself. it’s great, 10/10 recommended.
> 
> the books he had already finished are:
> 
> 1\. “aristotle and dante discover the secrets of the universe” by benjamine alire saenz. it’s about two boys in el paso in new mexico in the 80′ who teach each other to swim and some other things. also amazing, 10/10, one of the best books ever
> 
> 2\. “the picture of dorian gray” by oscar wilde. if yall don’t know that one i’m disappointed
> 
> the book he starts to read is “the happy prince and other stories” by, again, oscar wilde. it’s a collection of short stories he had written.
> 
> the record he’s listening to is “the queen is dead” by the smiths and the specific song is “the boy with the thorn in his side”. a good album!!!
> 
> the movie inception is really cool and i don’t know how to explain it without spoiling but it’s cool
> 
> thank u for reading!! it was also posted at my tumblr, @ garaugiovanni!


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